No sibling is perfect. Neither are your friends. The value of covenant relationships has depreciated tremendously. Relationships are not valued as they should be. Often times we focus on offenses and flaws the other party has.
The most important factor to your relationship with anyone is being Holy Spirit led. Am I my sister's keeper? Absolutely. Are boundaries necessary? Absolutely. It is your duty as a covenant sister to be vulnerable, honest, and protective.
Know your role. It's easy to step out of bounds if the relationship has not been defined. I know we can be some emotional creatures! Often times our relationships are filled with cattiness, gossip, and other harmful tactics meant to divide us. But that does not have to be so! There are two types of sisters you have: a vault & a trash can.
A vault is a secured place built within, where we store our valuables. We are careful to put our most important information, possessions, and valuables there. It also protects one from unauthorized use with a tightly closed door and more importantly an intricate lock code system. A vault sister is that safe place. Not only can she be a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen, she will pray with you. She prays for you. She may even help you carry a burden. But do not get too comfortable with her. Becoming so familiar may cause you to devalue her and your relationship. You may get so common with her that you began to dump all of your baggage and trash into her.
The trash can holds unimportant, broken, invaluable items. These items have depreciated or have began to decompose. When you treat a covenant sister like a trash can, you fill her ears with meaningless words, eat up her time, and distract her from her purpose.
Before you step into a relationship, be objective. A friendship or covenant relationship should not be taken lightly. She may seem fun now, but I promise you seasons do change. And there is nothing wrong with change, but please know that the commitment and work still remains.
She will get on your nerves. She will fall and need your prayers. She will talk too much. She will make mistakes. She will get offended. She will request apologies. She will need your grace. She will need your mercy. She will stumble and need your correction. She will get dull and need your sharpening. She will earn your trust. She will require forgiveness. She will need your assistance to reach her destiny. And you probably thought friendships were all about fun, shopping, or talking about your favorite television show. HA! Covenants require getting your hands dirty. You don't get to walk away when things get tough.
Love covers a multitude of sins. It's important to cover your sister, not expose her.
Are you a vault or a trash can? Can you be trusted? Can God trust you with His daughter? Will you protect her vulnerability? Will you talk about her with others? A good rule of thumb that will save many relationships is, if it's not your story to tell, don't tell it. You don't need another person on your level to pray with you about it.
As a covenant girl, each sister should be a vault. Treat her as such. Value her time as you would value someone important. Value the God in her. Never forget she is human just like you. Value her concerns, prayers, insecurities, and secrets just as you would your own.
-Ask TPJ
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